Hot chocolate is perfect for a number of occasions. When you’re curled up by a fireplace in your childhood home, next to family members who you haven’t seen in a long time. When all of you are decorating the tree and listening to Mariah Carey’s Christmas album.
When you’re doing none of the aforementioned things and are instead alone in a large city, wanting nothing but to feel comforted by something warm after you’ve been let down gently in an “it isn’t you, it’s me”-style breakup.
You might be thinking that this last occasion feels out of place with the others, but you’re wrong. Holidays and breakups go hand-in-hand! The holidays are a time of heightened joy, but also heightened tension and awareness—brought on by frequent social gatherings, gift purchases, and the inevitable marking of time (“Remember last Christmas? Remember Christmas twenty years ago?)—that can’t help but shed light on certain essential aspects of life. Family. Finances. The passage of time.
Your significant other comes to represent something larger. They are no longer just the person you’re trying to get to know at the moment, but Your Entire Future. The question becomes not just, “Do you want to invite this person to your family’s annual celebration?” but “Do you want to invite this person to your family’s annual celebration for the rest of your life?”
That is a lot to consider. And if your answer is, “Oh, please, no,” then it starts to raise some interesting questions about what exactly your intentions with this person are. And, yep, you guessed it: there’s probably a breakup coming at you.
But don’t fret! This mint hot chocolate is everything you could hope for in a comforting beverage. It’s vegan so it won’t be dairy-hard on your stomach. It’s minty so it tastes like Christmas and being refreshed and awake (the opposite of sleepy and depressed, which you may be naturally inclined to feel since you are now alone). And it’s hot, so you can drink it to stave off the cold if your bedroom is a poorly insulated hellscape in a decrepit pre-war apartment.
It doesn’t matter if you’re the break upper or the break upee. Take a sip and let the warmth wash over you.
Now, doesn’t that taste good?