My everyday is filled with moments in which I’ve had to decide whether I should keep my cool and do the daily “that’s sexist” in a rhythmic, almost song-like, whisper to myself or if I should go on a feminist rant and list 5-10 points as to why a statement is incorrect and clearly sexist. Hi, I’m Lola Montilla, and guess what? I’m a feminist.
I often walk into classrooms in which I’m the only, or one of the only females in the class. Although that would sound intimidating or scary to other girls, I’ll be happy to take on the challenge (not saying that men are a challenge, because that’s a generalization, and sing it with me –“Thaaaat’s sexist”.) I’ve been known to find the gender battle in any piece of literature I read, in any math problem, and most importantly my spiritual life class. I’m not going to judge because my school has a great spiritual department, but there’s just people you meet that are still subject to the “Men are the head of the house” rule and that needs to stop. That’s an abusive cycle that sexist people need to break out of. Be independent. Soar.
I tend to be judged by people with very narrow, conservative, or traditional upbringings in which the man is the provider, and the man is the strong one, and the man carries the family together and the man, the man, the man. But where are the people whose moms are “la jefa?” Where are the people that believe that women in general; in the workspace, school, and home can be in charge?
If there’s something worse than macho men, it’s the machista woman. The women who believe that their place is behind their man cleaning, cooking, and picking up after his messes because, yeah exactly, there’s no reason why. I get attacked by women my age or older when I say I’m a feminist, como algún tabú o alguna vaina. I’ve been told by men that my feminist attitude could push people away, but if they can’t stick by me, were they ever close? We are living in 2018, people! You’d think that my generation would barely see glimpses of fading misconceptions, but no, as a teen, and a teen feminist for that matter, I still struggle.
- I’ve been confronted with calling myself a feminist because: “It means that you want to be superior to men.” False. We just want to be treated as equals. HELLO.
- I’ve been asked if I’m abusive in my relationship because I’m a feminist and “feminists want to be dominant.”
- I’ve been asked if I hate men. Seriously?
- I’ve been told that “The word feminist means feminine, which implies that women have to be girlish and gentle.” Get a word origins book.
- I’ve been told (*breathes heavily*) that women don’t get paid more because they don’t strive for high demanding positions. I cry with laughter every time. By the way, have you read my latest blog posts?
- And (drumroll please) I’ve been asked if I shave my armpits, because “some feminists don’t shave.”
So, where am I going with all of this? I invite YOU and your closest feminist mates (female and male) to NOT hold back and not whisper to yourself that you believe something is wrong, but to SHOUT it out and prove your point, just as the dullard judging you. You do you, but don’t forget that you could be an important part of the movement. For the movement? You can help other feminists push through. Against it? Thanks for the motivation to prove you wrong. Either way, we’ll see you all at the top.