When I met my soon-to-be husband, we hit it off right away. Exactly two and a half weeks into dating, and just before we had the “are we boyfriend and girlfriend?” talk, we went away on a weekend getaway. When I told my friends about our plans, they were happy to hear that I found someone I really liked—but some also questioned whether we were moving too fast. When we moved in a month and a half into our relationship, questions of “moving too fast” came up once again.
Friends warned me against putting all of my eggs in one basket (um, what?) and “getting my hopes up” (for what, exactly?) but the truth is that I knew what I wanted in a relationship and I wasn’t going to let their bad advice keep me from knowing what I already knew: That this was the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. Sometimes it’s true what they say. When you know, you know. And I knew—which is precisely why I didn’t let anyone’s questions of whether my partner and I were moving too fast cloud my judgment.
Sadly, that’s not the only bad piece of advice I’ve gotten and I’m not the only one. Here, 15 women share the worst dating advice they ever received—and happily ignored, of course.
“Don’t talk about serious topics too early.”
“I’ve always been told that you shouldn’t bring up serious topics with a guy too early on into dating. This usually means don’t talk about marriage, future plans, kids, etc. I think the intention behind this is that people should go with the flow but my hesitation is that I could end up wasting my time with someone who wants something completely different. With my current boyfriend (who I’ve been with for a 2 and 1/2 years), I was very upfront about what I wanted and what I was looking for. I think the first day I met him I was like, ‘I’m not trying to mess around, I’m looking for a boyfriend who isn’t afraid of getting married if life and love leads us that way.’ It was bold and the vodka sodas I was sipping didn’t hurt but, since he’s also a few years younger than me, I felt I had to be as honest as possible from the jump. Looking back, he does say the conversation intimidated him but he knew that it meant that he had to be on his A-game and be committed from the start. So, that’s definitely a WIN in my opinion.” — Jessica